Weird dreams

I've been sleeping badly this week, due to exam stress, missing S, and large temperature variations between day and night. If I get overheated I get nightmares, and for the last few nights I've had a recurring theme in these nightmares. I dream that I wake up, overheated and gasping for breath (which indicates that I'm overheated when I'm dreaming lol). It's daytime, and later than it should be. I discover that the power is off, stumble out of bed and out into the living area, where I find that the rest of the family are out (as usual!) but they've left me asleep without letting me know that workmen were coming to do something electrical. So I stumble out in my pyjamas then get a massive shock when I find unexpected people in the house.

What the hell is my subconscious trying to tell me?!

"Contemplating thinking about thinking"

Heh, the title isn't all that relevant, except that I'm listening to the song it comes from right now (Robbie Williams' "Come Undone") and it seemed appropriate.

I've been writing an essay about Aspergers / High Functioning Autism kids, and also studying the subject in general, for both of my exams this semester, and I'm finding more and more things I do that really are Autistic traits. Take this quote from this website :

"One of the key symptoms common between boys and girls is a hyper-focused interest one particular thing or topic. For boys, the special interests are often in areas of science or transportation (trains or airplanes). In girls, the focus is often on animals or classic literature. The interest in and of itself isn't unusual, but a child with Asperger's will have an unusually intimate knowledge of his or her topic of interest. Young girls may play with dolls and have imaginary friends, which doesn't seem at all unusual. However, her interest in these things will continue even when she's a teenager and they should have been outgrown."

ZOMG. I was still playing with dolls at 14, and only stopped because I moved house and never got to unpack them again. And classic literature . . . before I discovered fantasy, I flatly refused to read anything that was not set in the 1800s. The only exception I made was for certain novels that fitted in with my other obsessions (such as first names - the "Babysitters Club" books fed this obsession rather well). Even today I'm pretty damn obsessed with 1800s literature, and I occasionally start writing stories about characters that are actually my childhood dolls o_O Set, of course, in the 1800s.

I also stim. I had never, ever realised this before, but I do. I scratch lightly at my hands, arms and legs - not enough to leave more than a slight red mark, but enough to counteract the sensory overload from things like breezes and goosebumps, which I've always hated feeling. Eeep!

And another completely unrelated topic in this grab-bag post: a slight rofl. As I was walking down the library steps, I heard two guys behind me having the following conversation:

1: Seen Mary-Jane lately?
2: Yeah, a few days ago.
1: Uhuh
2: I was gonna go see her this morning, but you know . . . exams and all that
1: Didn't we agree that Mary-Jane was a distraction when it comes to studying?
2 (laughing): Yeah, well.

The two guys were both quite young - I'd say first or second year, so 20 or younger - and I just can't help wondering whether they really thought they were having a subtly disguised conversation about marijuana. Because it was pretty blatantly obvious to me lol. They sounded like they thought they were being so clever and devious :-D

That's all for now, I think, lol

o_O (random)

I will never understand why it is that criminals think it's okay to talk about their crimes - past or future - in loud voices, while on public transport.

Today on the train  - a reasonably crowded 9am train - I stood there listening to one crook proudly telling another about how he was on bail for having fired a gun right next to a fellow crook's ear, busting the other guy's eardrum, because the other guy didnt believe he was being threatened with a real gun.

Seriously, should the whole damn train be hearing this? 

In the past I've listened to guys casually threatening to kill people for snitching, conducting drug deals, and all manner of weird stuff. The police ought to have a dozen plain-clothes officers on every train, they'd clean up so much petty crime that way.

It just blows my mind. Don't these people even wonder whether someone might dob them in?

At last!

With my phone functioning normally today, the Ed Dept managed to get through to me, and finally I know where I'm going next year.

I'm not going to post the name of the town here since that'd be giving away my exact location during school hours next year! But I can say that it's a small town in the inner wheatbelt east of Perth. It's about 1.5-2 hours from anywhere significant in Perth. It was my second choice when I ranked the schools in my placement request, and it's only half an hour's drive from my first choice, which is a larger town with lots of community facilities, hence the attraction. The town I'm going to is convenient and close to the city, and it's a quiet, pleasant town that I think will be thoroughly manageable as a home for the next year or two. I'll be moving out there sometime in mid to late January next year, ready for the start of the teachers' term on the 31st of January.

All up, I'm very happy!

Aieee . . .

Today, while I was out and about, my phone battery died. So, of course, THE ED DEPT HAVE BEEN TRYING TO REACH ME ALL DAY REGARDING MY PLACEMENT!

AAAAAAARGH!

*breathes*

They got through to Mum at home, who said that I'd be available tomorrow, so with any luck they'll manage to call me tomorrow. But . . . zomg, of all the worst luck! Nyak!

The Michelle Phenomenon

Would someone, anyone please explain to me why it is that, when someone forgets my real name, they invariably substitute Michelle?

It's bizarre. It happened back when I used to work at Coles, it happened at uni, it happened in Sydney, it happened in my secretarial job, and it happened again yesterday when I was filling in at another store as part of my current junk-job.

W.T.F.?

Do I look like a Michelle? What does a Michelle look like? Why does that particular name jump into peoples' heads, and not any other? I just don't get it!

And I don't even particularly like the name Michelle!

*sigh*

Don't worry, nothing's wrong, I'm just feeling all roiled up this evening. I'm tired of having to deal with personalities all the time - some people bring out the Aspergers worse than others, and I just get so fed up and cranky with the way I can't understand them and they can't understand me. I'm sick of dealing with so many people for so much of my time. I want a little family and pets and chickens and a big block and some space to think and grow without so many people hammering on my skull all the time wanting me to come out and be like them. Ugh. Why can't I just hide?